Unmasking Kink

Season 1 Episode 16 - Unmasking Making Your Dom Feel Safe

In this episode, I’m digging into a side of D/s that doesn’t get talked about nearly enough. We spend so much time focusing on submissive safety — physical, emotional, mental — and that’s incredibly important. But somewhere along the way, people started acting like Doms don’t need support, reassurance, or space to be human.
This week’s conversation was inspired by a fantastic piece of writing from one of my favorite creators on FetLife, RopeTigerDaddy. His post really hit me, because it put into words something I’ve seen and felt in my own dynamics. Doms need safety too. They need trust, communication, and grace. They need room to learn, to grow, and, yes, to make mistakes without being treated like monsters.
In this episode, I talk about what emotional safety looks like for Doms, how to tell the difference between a mistake and a red flag, how to navigate vulnerability on both sides of the slash, and what it means to grow together instead of demanding perfection.
You can read the original writing that sparked this episode here:https://fetlife.com/RopeTigerDaddy/posts/13147534
Check out his profile:https://fetlife.com/RopeTigerDaddy
Connect with me on FetLife:https://fetlife.com/Nova-Monroe(make sure you include the hyphen!)
If you have thoughts, questions, stories, or anything you want to share after listening, reach out to me on FetLife or visit UnmaskingKink.com. I love hearing how these episodes land for you.
Until next time, stay curious my friends, and take care of one another.

Season 1 Episode 15 - Unmasking Kink in Public

In this episode, I’m taking a closer look at something people don’t always talk about honestly: what belongs in public, what belongs in private, and why consent doesn’t stop at the bedroom door. Kink isn’t shameful and it isn’t something to hide, but it is something that requires maturity, intention, and informed consent from everyone involved.
I talk about how shared spaces work, why people who didn’t opt in shouldn’t be exposed to adult themes, and why age-appropriate education matters — especially when it comes to teens and brand-new eighteen year olds who are still figuring out who they are. I also look at some recent examples of kink showing up in places it probably shouldn’t, like college campuses and public events, and why that blurs the line between education and influence.
I share a personal story from a karaoke night I worked, where a surprise drag show took over the entire evening without warning. It wasn’t about who was performing — it was about not being given the choice to participate. Later, when another event came through, I was given the option to opt out, and that difference shows exactly what consent looks like in everyday life.
This episode is all about respect, context, and remembering that freedom doesn’t cancel responsibility. Public doesn’t mean permission, and true kink is always rooted in communication and consent.
Until next time, stay curious my friends! And take care of one another.

Season 1 Episode 14 - Unmasking a Sub

In this episode, I’m exploring the other side of the slash and unmasking what it really means to be a submissive.
Submission is often misunderstood as weakness or obedience, but that’s not what it is at all. It’s trust, it’s choice, and it’s connection. I talk about what submission looks like for me, why communication and safewords are signs of strength, and how giving power can be just as intentional as holding it.
From brats and rope bunnies to service subs, littles, and masochists, I share the many sides of submission and how each one expresses trust in a different way. Whether you’re new to kink or just curious about the other side of the dynamic, this episode is all about finding strength in surrender.
💜 Episode Title: Unmasking a Sub🎙️ Host: Nova Monroe🎧 Listen now on Podbean, Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and everywhere you get your shows.

Season 1 Episode 13 - Unmasking a Dom

In this episode, I’m going back to the basics and unmasking one of the most misunderstood roles in BDSM, the Dominant.
 
What does it really mean to be a Dom? Is it about power, control, leadership, or something deeper? I talk about what makes a good Dom, the difference between playing Dom and actually being one, and why real dominance is built on trust, awareness, and care, not ego.
 
From Gentle Doms to Primal, Service, and Pleasure Doms, I share how each style can look and how they connect with their counterparts. Whether you’re new to the scene or just curious about what healthy dominance really looks like, this episode lays the groundwork.
 
💜 Episode Title: Unmasking a Dom
🎙️ Host: Nova Monroe
🎧 Listen now on Podbean, Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and everywhere you get your shows.

Season 1 Episode 12 - Unmasking Shibari

This week on Unmasking Kink, I’m talking about Shibari. Rope bondage, Japanese rope art, whatever you call it, it’s one of the most beautiful and meaningful parts of my kink journey. I’ve been self-tying for three years, but this week I got to rig for the first time, and it completely changed how I see connection and creativity.
 
In this episode, I talk about how rope brings me calm, the difference between tying yourself and tying someone else, and why safety and communication matter more than anything. I share my favorite places to learn, what kind of rope to start with, and the beauty in slowing down to create something together.
 
It’s not about control. It’s not about sex. It’s about art, trust, and the way rope can feel like a really good hug.
 
Here are a few resources I mention in the episode:
Rory’s Brainworks on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@RorysBrainworks
HookedOnKnots on Fetlife: https://fetlife.com/hookedonknots
Fetlife (main site): https://fetlife.com
 
Listen, learn, unmask.

Season 1 Episode 11 - Unmasking When to Ask About Kink

When is the right time to bring up kink while dating, and how do you do it without it getting weird? In this episode, I explain why there really is no wrong way to ask, as long as it comes from honesty and respect. I share how to start the conversation naturally, how to set boundaries with confidence, and why clear communication and defined expectations are the foundation for real relationships, not just play.

Season 1 Episode 10 - Unmasking DD/lg

In this episode, I break down what Daddy Dom/little girl really means from my perspective as a little. I share:
What being a little looks like in my everyday life
The difference between littles and middles
Real-life caregiving moments with Scorpio
Bratting as part of personality, not just behavior
What Daddies get out of the dynamic
Busting common myths about DD/lg
DD/lg isn’t about children or abuse. It’s about two consenting adults choosing roles that bring comfort, structure, and joy. For me, it’s about balance, playfulness, and trust.

Season 1 Episode 9 - Unmasking Safe Words

This week on Unmasking Kink, I dive deep into safe words, what they are, how they work, and why they matter. From Homer Simpson to Fifty Shades of Grey, safe words in pop culture don’t always get it right. But in real life, they’re the backbone of trust in kink.
I'll share my first experience with safe words, explore verbal and non-verbal options, and explain why safe words aren’t just for bottoms, tops need them too. Plus, a look at group play, CNC, and what to do if a safe word is ignored.
Safe words are the seatbelts of kink: most of the time you don’t need them, but when you do, you’ll be grateful they’re there.

Season 1 Episode 8 - Unmasking One True Way

One-true-way attitudes are everywhere in online kink spaces: “real subs never have limits,” “a Dom should never apologize,” “if you’re not 24/7, it’s not real.”
In this episode, Nova Monroe breaks down why those statements are harmful, shares how she handles gatekeeping attitudes, and offers a better way: building your own rulebook.
💜 Listen in, roll your eyes with me at the gatekeepers, and remember — the only true way is the one that works for you.

Season 1 Episode 7 - Unmasking 50 Shades of Grey

I know I’m way late to the party, but I finally sat down and watched Fifty Shades of Grey for the first time—and I’ve got some thoughts. Big ones.
The BDSM community loves to drag this movie, calling it abusive, unrealistic, or just plain harmful. But my take? It’s not the floggers or the contract that bothered me. The real issues are communication gaps, experience imbalances, and the one subplot that truly is dangerous: Christian’s grooming backstory.
In this episode, I break down:
Why the real power imbalance isn’t money, but experience.
How the movie does show negotiation, safewords, and even aftercare (just not the way you’d expect).
Why trauma doesn’t “explain kink,” but it does explain Christian’s walls in relationships.
And the biggest red flag of all: the Mrs. Robinson subplot, and why it’s the most harmful part of the story.
At the end of the day, Fifty Shades is fiction—not a field manual. So let’s talk about what it got wrong, what it surprisingly got right, and what lessons kinksters and vanilla folks alike can take away from it.
🎙️ Unmasking Kink is here every Friday—subscribe so you don’t miss an episode!